Single Mothers?

My friend is pregnant having problems with the father of her child. Me myself im not married either and pregnant. I have some problems with the father of my child and dont want to think that I could end up not marrying him and a single mother but me and my friend were talking about it. so our question is single mothers if you dont mind telling your story? How are it is? What got you thru? And how you keep pushing..My friend is scared to be a single mother and says she will stay with the father of her child no matter what...As for me I disagree my child will have his dad in his life but that does not mean I cant survive without him...Any answers would be appreciated once again thanks and blessings...

Single Mothers?
I'm a single (divorced) mom. My son is 8. Although I was with his father in the beginning, in my mind I've been a single mom all along because I couldn't count on him for nothing. He was in and out of the house for one reason or another (jail, stupidity, etc.). After I realized that our relationship was only necessary for the birth of God's child, I opted to let him go for good. Up until March 2007 it had been 2 years since he'd seen or spoken with my son. Even though he only lives 3 hours away. I don't get child support yet. I've filed and am just waiting for the court to order the amount because the amount was not stipulated in my divorce papers. He has other kids and other support orders. I can usually count on $100 per year from him ($50 for my son's birthday and $50 for Christmas).





My son last saw his "sperm donor" at his 1/2 brother's birthday party in March 2007. As usual, promises were made but not kept. I keep it real with my son. I've never talked down about his father to him, but I've always tried to protect his feelings when it comes to the let downs. In so many words I let him know that he can't take what his father says at face value. Because of this my son is strong in dealing with the situation. He knows he has me and he also has other men (grandpa and uncles) in his life. He spends a lot of time with my father, which is a good thing.





How do I keep pushing? I look to my child for strength. He needs me to be strong. I need to be strong for him to show him that you don't have to SETTLE for anything just for the sake of saying you have something. Staying with someone and putting up with B.S. could cause more harm to that child than good.





Most recently though, my son now has someone to call Dad. My wonderful fiance. He loves my son as much as he loves me and it shines through brightly. They have something in common... his father wasn't there for him either. They both have a yearning... one for a dad and one to be different than his dad ever was.





If the father is a willing participant in the child's life no matter what's going on in the adult relationship that's all good. If not, it's not the end of the world. It's his loss!





Look to God for strength and remember time heals all wounds. Financially, you can do it. It's not that tough. Just work with what you have and look for other benefits (child support, discounted medical, WIC).
Reply:im not a single mother, but i think that it is an awesome responsibility and can definitely appreciate what single mothers go through. it wont be easy, i know a lot of single moms, but it can be done, and there are a lot of children who turn out to be wonderful people- who only have one parent. good luck to you and your friend!
Reply:I am almost 4 mos preggy, and I will be a single mother most of the time. Just dumped my fiance, because of his legal issues and other issues. He will be there and hold the baby, but not like a live in mommy and daddy. It scares me but he will be in my babys life regardless. I will not take his father away from him, but if I dont get the money I want per week for my baby, clothes diapers, etc I will get him on child support. missbitchaverse@yahoo.com e-mail me. Due in November. We can do this together. Congrats and Good Luck

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