Still single - No Confidence! I hate it!?

Hey Everyone,





I have been single since my ex girlfriend became a lesbian after years of denial! Been a few years now!





I have a big group of friends and I am the only single one out of the lot, I never meet anyone and when I do we are just "friends" or totally blow me off!





Cinema, Meals, Trips Out are always in couples. It has got to the point when I am really down about it as people now think that I am gay because I have been single for so long!





I have put some weight on and I have a stutter which makes things worse, also I am quite small for my age - only 5foot 5inches!





No girls never come up to me never but they do to my friends, im not really ugly or to die for attractive either but what is wrong with me. I'm a nice guy, like romantic things and I am training to be a nurse. All the girls think it is sweet and all of the girls I know are just friends.





Sorry to be on a downer but what am I doing wrong? Anybody got any advice?





Thanks,





BenE :)

Still single - No Confidence! I hate it!?
I didn't try to "get a girl" - I prayed that God would send the right woman for me to spend my life with. He sent me the most wonderful woman, and we've been married over 30 years. You say that you have "just friends" in the girls you know. Well, my wife was one of my best friends! One of those girls may be wishing you would spend more time with them.





As for your stuttering, visit the web site for The Stuttering Foundation of America at www.stutteringhelp.org as that is where several uncles and cousins of mine found help. All of them became more fluent by using the Foundation's book "Self Therapy for the Stutterer." Some libraries have it.





Relax and enjoy life. Let God give you all the blessings He has for you.
Reply:when i split with my ex (he left me for someone else) i had no confidence at all.i couldn't do anything without the approval or back up of someone else. i used to leave nights out early cos i just couldn't face being surrounded by happy people when i felt like i couldn't join in. i remember a disastrous shopping trip with a friend when i was that low and lacking in confidence i couldn't make a decision cos i doubted myself that much.


its been 2.5 years since we split and i'm a million times better than i was. l was the same as you, surrounded by couples and happy families. my saving grace was my friends. i have a fabulous circle of close female friends who really helped me build myself back up. also in the last 6 months or so there have been a few new faces (male and female) joined our crowd, each bringing a couple more friends. so its good that i am meeting more people in a really easy way.





persevere but try to widen your social circle (maybe go out with people from work) it may do you good to see new people who don't know about your previous girlfriend.
Reply:Your question says it all-no confidence.





When you accept yourself and stop believing that you are doing 'something wrong' you will flourish.





I like the word 'yet'. A small word but an important one:





'I don't have a girlfriend...yet'





Take it easy. Namaste.
Reply:Me too!!


Be patient; it's a matter of luck.
Reply:I am sure you will find the right person for you later. so often, the best relatioships are the ones we wait for, rather than rush into.
Reply:I think you answered your question...if you feel like someone with no confidence then that will come across in the communcation. People can sense it, so you need to work on improving your confidence.
Reply:I am looking for my guy,


email me at sweetlittlebrat98@yahoo.com
Reply:well i am in a similar situation to you..but i,m still nursing a broken heart..i have just joined a dance class and am hoping to make some new friends there maybe you should try something new and make some new friends?? hope that helps if not shall we cry together!!
Reply:Enjoy the single life! Be glad you dont have to go through stress in relationships now. You will eventually get a girl. You probably arent meeting the right girls, which is why you havent got a gf yet. Or maybe you arent being confident of yourself or something...
Reply:the secret to the confidence part is easy just look in mirror every day laugh at yourself pull funny faces start to love yourself more and confidence will grow


as for being single be happy just accept it there loads people single


maybe if you lucky one day someone might just come along


i wouldnt go looking for it or start feel down about it BE HAPPY !


just think all those married men that cant even get night out with mates cause there woman dont let them lol


being single has advantages start to focus on them
Reply:you sound like a really sweet guy! the only thing i think you're doing wrong is that you are not venturing outside of your circle of friends... live it up a little! meet new girls somewhere other than through your friends. hope i helped!
Reply:BenE - stop looking and someone will find you.


It will happen when you least expect it!!
Reply:you sound gr8 n if i met u i wouldnt back off lol


the right person will come along but untill then enjoy life!
Reply:to be honest ben i think you sound awesome - too good to be true





think its just cinfidence with you though, next time you are out smile at a sexy young woman and ask if she would like a drink, bet she says yes





xxxx
Reply:U know what BenE? I am a model and I hardly never get asked out! It's not about how you look! Maybe girls do like you, they just don't approach you because you have no confidence. The guys who are unconfident, or desperate , or too keen often get trampled on by girls. Show your humour, your confidence and girls will notice. It just doesnt mean that they will come up to you.





About your stutter and stuff... don't worry about that babe! Good girls.. not horrible shallow bitches.... will love that about you.. imperfections are beautiful. It make you you! Nice, down to earth girls (the ones you want!) love nerdier, sweeter boys. My boyfriend still wears Spiderman T-shirts!! Leave the shallow girls to go off with guys with muscles in tight t-shirts!!





You just work on your confidence.. I am 5"10 and hated it untill I was 20 (last yr!) but then stopped thinking i looked like a man and realised it wasn't important! lol





But seriously, please, don't look for love. It will only come your way when you are ready. Would you really make a good boyfriend having no confidence? No! It would create insecurity! You will meet an amazing girl when you realise you're special and that you don't need a Girlfriend, you just want one.





Try joining a gym..... it releases amazing chemicals in your brain and you will instantly feel better about yourself. If you are embarrased, work out at home. You'll feel healthier and more confident in no time.. trust me! :O)
Reply:i dont know i would take u home you sound like a sweet guy and believe me someone is there for u maybe not today or tomorrow but in the future cause all the bad guys get found out
Reply:I have no confidence either, but I'm quite an attractive girl in a non vain way. It's not all about confidence, but confidence plays a big part. The reason you are single is not because of your looks, it is because other people can tell when you are not confident. When you learn to love yourself for who you are, people will pick up on that TRUST ME! It almost kind of radiates off you lol honestly! Positive thinking leads to positive outcomes.


That helps me, plus having lots of girl friends will make you more comfrotable with girls you like
Reply:don't feel bad


i bet there are loads of girls who want to go out with you but you just don't know they do


i have a couple of mates that feel the same way that you do and i do to some times


if you ever need anybody to talk to please feel free to email me i will do my best to cheer you up anytime you need cheering up


:)
Reply:The same thing everyone else is doing wrong.





Trying too hard.





Clear you head and be your own person. Get confident stupid. (sorry bad joke).





Women dont want a winey wreck wondering constantly why they cant score.





Forget about a relationship. Make you and your life attractive. Treat every social situation like you are already married.





Then you wont be firing out the PLEASSSSEEEE LOVE MEEEEEEE signals.





Women are put of by needy. Radiate modjo instead.
Reply:have the same problem!!